The power of being just like the others girls

Among the many insults directed at girls, there is one in particular that is especially vicious and subtle. It is the "you are just like all the other girls"," said with derision and contempt to signify superficiality, adherence to trends and fashion, stupidity and frivolity, inability to think for oneself, and sometimes even with more or less hidden shades of slutshaming.

The basic girl loves autumn

With the arrival of autumn being like other girls, or rather a basic b*tch, takes on a very specific meaning. Namely, the autumn b*sic bitch is Y2K, wears UGGs and sweatshirts, big and over-the-top scarves in earthy colours, loves Pumpkin Spice Latte from Starbucks and instagrams photos of boots in the leaves, listens to Taylor Swift and reads romantic books. It goes hand in hand with another topos of internet culture, Christian Girl Autumn, a meme that goes back to the person Caitlin Covington and has now become a digital pop culture classic.

The war of the girls

It's easy to see how this phrase can be used to pit girls against each other, competing for the attention of the man on duty, looking for something that will make them stand out and tell them: "I am not like the others, I'm different, just like you like it." So girls (especially the youngest and most impressionable) have long strived to develop interests that are considered different or original, and to block out the others because they are considered too trivial, easy, pompous or feminine.

Phenomenology of the Pick Me Girl

In contrast, the pick-me-girl rises above her peers, claiming to be different and profound, intellectually superior, a little weird and maybe even foul-mouthed. She prides herself on having only male friends and speaks ill of other women. Pink, boy bands and fluff, autumn drinks and fan fiction are forbidden. Make way for sports, male authors and alternative and rock music. In short, it is the victory of the male gaze.

All for the men

We are not here to decide what girls can and cannot like, quite the opposite. The problem arises when this battle over aesthetics, manners, forms of expression and interests is fought in the name of male consideration, which takes advantage of this battle. Now, however, the girls have had enough and have decided to no longer be held captive by these expressions and to no longer fear the highest insult, the accusation of "being like the other girls", in a big effort against internalised misogyny.

The beauty of being girls together

On social media and in public, in a renewed commitment to female closeness and solidarity, girls are turning the meaning of "being like the other girls" on its head, rediscovering their love of all that is feminine, and proudly proclaiming that they are just like every other girls, equal in their girlhood and proud to share interests and passions with others without denying their own diversity. "Being just like the others," in this case does not mean that everyone conforms to the same stereotype, but rather that one freely explores one's own femininity, discovering one's strengths and passions without the burden of external conditioning, in a broad and nuanced idea of femininity that is open to experimentation. And there is also room for football or Formula 1, better if in pink.

Caitlin Covington

The case of Caitlin Covington is emblematic. For years she was seen as the face of a very particular type of woman, a kind of young Karen in the making, reactionary and nasty. She has since emerged as a great champion of LGBT+ rights, donating a large sum to the trans creator who made her famous. Like all girls who claim their right to be like other girls, Caitlin wants to be seen as a complex, multi-layered human being who goes beyond the surface and upends the meaning of what it means to be a basic b*itch and what that definition entails.